Now, how does someone who earns few thousand dollars tax free a month, lives in a cushy apartment in Westlands, Nairobi, on an international medical insurance, goes to the "field/Mogadishu" once in a while under heavy military escort and takes fully paid 3 times a year "rest and recuperation" break, teach someone who has endured 20+ years civil war or even born and raised in a civil war, resilience?! I have heard of a lot of pretentious and dumb ideas come out of the UN/NGOs but the concept of privileged white people teaching "poor Africans" resilience is just amazing! The UN and Western NGOs working on Somalia could learn about resilience by moving their over-funded offices to Mogadishu and stay put for just a year without an RnR, to see if they will still talk about resilience with a straight face.
Monday, April 7, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Dear ambitious, driven, beautiful, successful in their fields, educated single ladies, you are not "on the shelf" and unable to find a life partner. There are plenty of men who will jump at the chance to get you house arrested, but you are no longer willing prisoners. Times have changed and since you don't depend on a man for anything and are self-sufficient, you are after a compatible life partner you can respect and be proud to have in your life. So, stop feeling sorry for your eternal singleton.
Finding a true life partner is a rare experience. That someone who challenges you, supports, loves and respects you and who has his own ambitions and friends. Someone who doesn’t suffocate and thinks of you as a baby factory and cleaning lady! A man who can engage your mind, body and soul and who teaches you as much as he learns new things from you. Don’t get me wrong, this business of soulmate I think is for 15 year old girls. I am talking about a man for a grown woman, realistic partnership upon which to build a solid team that can handle anything which comes their way and share the adventures of life together.
If children are the things that has forced so many to settle, there are plenty in orphanages who need you and a loving home. However, those who would prefer to experience a child birth and have their own biological children, there are plenty of women having babies by themselves. I don’t know how they do it but they are out there and they have my respect. For those of you like me with absolutely no plans to be a single mother, switch off that damn ticking clock and accept nothing good comes easily. And whatever you do, never settle. Subscribe to Ann Summers if you must but don’t listen to society, preachers or married people about why you should just find a good enough Joe and settle down. Neither should you pity yourself for being forever single, it is a choice you made and I know how lonely it can sometimes be but trust me, better lonely than in an average, dull and uninspiring relationship. Don’t let the couples with picture perfect images of their marriage fool you that every married woman is a happy woman. The truth is often a lot less rosy and complicated. I am not saying they are all miserable and I hope at least most of them are happy but you get my point. Stay single and stubborn until you find a partner worth giving up the rewarding freedom that comes with the singleton life for.