Dear Diaspora Somali women, do us a favour and stick with the men in your hood! You bring nothing but trouble when you show up after years living abroad and you come back home to find husbands. Thing is, most of you return home when you have established yourselves (in other words, got divorced twice or never managed to meet someone interested in you), which means you are at least 30 years old and you are looking for men your age or older to settle with. Guess what? Most men this age are already married with few children so you are basically, husband-snatchers! How can we 'locals' compete against you when you offer our men financial rewards for leaving us? You promise them a life of comfort, free from responsibility with housing, car and all bills paid!! You show up, snatch them, put them up in a hotel, pay for the wedding and the dowry and after few weeks in honeymoon, where he spends his days avoiding phone calls from his wife and kids, you go back to your adopted home in the West. Back to your council estate, job or business where you continue to financially support him and promise to take him away from this land of hardship and poverty to the promised land with golden pavements and easy life.
We are kindly asking our sisters to please leave our men alone and stop destroying our families! There are enough Somali men in the Diaspora, aren't they enough?
We are kindly asking our sisters to please leave our men alone and stop destroying our families! There are enough Somali men in the Diaspora, aren't they enough?
The writer of this should be ashamed of herself. I live in the homeland myself but i refuse to blame a man who is willing or can be convinced to leave you behind in the first place.
ReplyDeleteMy advice is to try and find a man who is unlikely to do that to you. Expand your sense of judgement.
everybody is entitled to their own opinion and that is her.....that is her dilemma and you may not be able to understand it but that is what she is facing..human is to error and we must accept that the men are becoming lazier and have lost hope and motivation to work through hardship and if the grass is greener on the other end why would he not chose the better. This woman is speaking of her realities, u may not agree on it but agree to disagree...Fact is the ladies from the diaspora are coming back home to search for husbands because the quality of the somali men in the diaspora is lacking, sad but true, they have forgotten their values, principles and religion. The men are now of western culture and some are lazy waiting for the usual government had out....this is my opinion...agree to disagree but the lens in which we view the world is tainted with different subjective considerations...
ReplyDeleteVery interesting reactions! @Hibo, you blame the writer or the reality? Lol. Am always amused by how Somalis take issues so personally! Ladies, thanks for your feedback.
ReplyDeleteWooaah.....to look from another perspective better blame husbands too for allowing to be taken, i wonder for anything that happens its the Feminine Gender to face the trails......or what do you thing?
ReplyDelete@Felis, totally agree. U can't blame one side on this issue and if husband is 'taken' he has made a choice to deserted his family. Re your question, I honestly think we get what we ask for and Somali women seem to be asking for so little of their men! Demand better treatment from the men and you get it and if you don't, you can choose to hold out till the right one comes alone.
ReplyDelete@ Fatuma, well said.
Delete@ Fatuma Abdullahi: That is spot on, why do they come back to look for husbands? Why is it that those Somali men and women abroad never marry from their? The women come back to look for husbands and the men to look for wives. It seems they have too much knowledge of each others' escapades to trust each other.
ReplyDeleteXudayi, I couldn't have put it better! Weird thing is tho, Somalis in the Diaspora assume the ones back home are any more trustworthy.
DeleteI believe we live in a free world, we can marry from anywhere we feel like, coming to African and marrying the person of your chose does not make anyone from West a thief or a person who who breaks peoples marriage, let us be honest to each other here, .....after all we all came from Africa and we marry from Arfican to support and help our people...nothing more unless otherwise...
ReplyDeletePrince, of course we are free to chose, but marrying away a man who is already married with kids and is clearly charmed by the European/American passport and free money, that is husband-snatching! Supporting and helping Africans is where the trouble starts.
DeleteHey, I am not Somali, but I can pass for a lot of things... where do I sign up?
ReplyDelete